Recently, I asked my readers a question: Do you ever see yourself as a beginner?
As experienced professionals, we can become so accustomed to being the person who knows that we forget the value of becoming curious again.
Expertise helps us recognize patterns, anticipate concerns, and guide people through decisions that may feel unfamiliar or overwhelming. Yet those familiar patterns can sometimes lead us to a conclusion before we fully understand the person in front of us.
This matters when we serve older adults.
A client’s age may provide useful context. It cannot tell us what that person values, fears, understands, hopes to preserve, or wants to change. So, how can curiosity help professionals build greater trust with older clients?
The Answer May Be Reasonable and Still Be Incomplete
Consider this composite situation.
An older woman meets with a financial advisor after the death of her husband. She has investment accounts to review, forms to complete, and decisions to make.
The advisor recognizes that she may be grieving and takes time to explain everything carefully. He speaks slowly, repeats some basic information, and directs several questions to her adult daughter. He assumes the client’s greatest concern is financial security and recommends simplifying her accounts.
His approach is well-intentioned.
What he does not yet know is that the woman managed the family finances for decades. She understands the accounts well. Her real concern is whether she can help a grandchild start a business without disrupting her own long-term plans. A curious question could have changed the conversation:
What matters most to you as you think about these decisions? That question would have revealed the person behind the circumstances.
Curiosity Creates Room for the Individual
Professionals who serve older adults often work with patterns that repeat.
An elder law attorney hears familiar concerns about protecting assets and planning for care. A senior living advisor recognizes the fears that can arise when a family is considering a move. A healthcare professional knows the questions that often follow a new diagnosis.
Experience helps us identify what may be happening.
Curiosity helps us discover what is happening for this person.
That distinction is central to age-friendly care. The Age-Friendly Health Systems framework includes “What Matters” as one of its four essential areas. It encourages professionals to understand each older adult’s goals and preferences and align care with them. The principle has value far beyond healthcare. (The John A. Hartford Foundation)
Before we explain, recommend, or reassure, we might ask:
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What would a good outcome look like for you?
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What are you most concerned about?
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What do you already understand about this?
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Who would you like involved in the decision?
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What would you like me to understand before we continue?
These questions communicate respect. They also uncover information that no demographic profile, intake form, or AI-generated summary can fully provide.
Digital Experiences Need Curiosity Too
Assumptions can be built into websites and digital processes long before a human conversation begins.
A website may use oversized text and simplified language because its audience includes older adults. Those choices may improve accessibility, yet accessibility should not come at the expense of substance.
An intake form may assume that an adult child is arranging the appointment. A senior living website may speak almost entirely to family members while overlooking the older adult researching options independently. An automated assistant may guide a visitor through predetermined choices without leaving space for a concern that does not fit the menu.
Good digital communication anticipates needs. Curious design tests those assumptions with the people who will use it.
It asks whether the information is clear without being condescending, supportive without taking away agency, and easy to navigate without reducing a complex decision to a few convenient categories.
Expertise and Curiosity Belong Together
Curiosity does not require professionals to set aside what they know. It helps them use that knowledge with greater care.
The experienced professional still recognizes patterns, explains risks, and offers guidance. Curiosity creates a pause before that expertise is applied. Within that pause, the client has room to share the detail that changes the meaning of the situation.
This is especially important when age-based assumptions are involved. Two people of the same age may have entirely different levels of health, digital confidence, financial knowledge, family support, and comfort with risk.
Their chronological age may be the least revealing thing about how they will make a decision.
Begin With What You Do Not Yet Know
Trust grows when people feel that their professional sees more than a category, condition, account, or stage of life.
The next time an older client’s situation appears familiar, notice what your experience tells you. Then leave room for what experience alone cannot reveal.
Ask one more question.
Listen for the answer that does not fit the expected pattern.
And consider:
What might this person want me to understand before I decide what they need? That is where curiosity becomes more than a personal quality. It becomes a professional practice—and a meaningful expression of respect.
Yvonne A. Jones
Yvonne A Jones is a Human-Centered Communication Strategist and Writer for the Longevity Economy. She helps professionals and organizations serving older adults communicate with greater clarity, empathy, and respect so they can build trust before the first conversation.
Drawing on decades of corporate and entrepreneurial leadership, customer experience, coaching, and elder-care experience, Yvonne writes about the connection between language, trust, decision-making, and the way older adults experience professional services.
She is the author of From Invisible to Impactful: How Seasoned Professionals Turn Their Experience Into Clear Messaging and Online Authority. She also provides Homepage Communication Clarity & Trust Assessments and writing support for professionals who want their online presence to reflect the quality of care and expertise they provide.